☭ monophonic taxi ; Shutter Island background sound

Just got back from Ikano's Teppanyaki. Then we got shaved ice from 100 yen shop. I'm living at my in laws at Kota Damansara until I deliver. All day I sleep. For the moment I can't watch tv because their astro beyond card is deactivated for unknown reasons.

So it's been a week that I listened to my FIL screaming at the customer service people several times a day. Actually the problem started since 3 months ago when they changed from astro max to astro beyond hd, the card didn't work, so the technician guy lent his card so we got like 2 months of all the channels. Then last week the technician came again to give back the original smartcard and life since then have been monochromatic. My FIL even suggested to them to either give him a new card or just give him a new account already because it's obviously the smartcards at fault. He yelled at almost all the csr people and their managers. Sometimes I pity them sometimes I think they deserve it because of the inaction.

Herr J dreamt of holding the baby twice already. I have baby check up on Monday. Baby healthy. Now people started to tell us to name the baby according to the birthday or whatever. I never knew this could be complicated. I thought we can just google a name with good meaning and it's done. Now I hear about how certain names can be heavy for the baby to carry.

Herr j wanted to go to icity but I think it's just an overrated crappy place.

Labels: Marbles Bubbles

☭ monophonic taxi ;

Very busy. Actually no I wasn't supposed to be this busy, but Herr J's habit of leaving everything to the last minute until it snowballed into a huge complicated problem is legendary. To this point we haven't done the mgtt, the baby checkup, pick up our marriage cert, attend a marriage course. Why? I don't know why. Mostly because he'd rather sleep and then go play lucky ball everyday. Another reason is because of the car. It couldn't be started, kept blowing up all the relays so Herr J kept buying new relays instead of taking a day off to take the car to a workshop. If the poor thing hasn't died, it would never see a repairman and it would never be fixed until.

Yesterday he went to the turf club then suddenly he said Maen wanted to go to Genting. I think he just didn't want Maen to know he's at the turf club because Maen never has money, especially for his friends. I had to go since he's wasting my money because people with common sense can see that it's useless for a pregnant woman to go there because all she gets is blistered feet. I hate going anywhere in Maen's car because it smell bad and it made all the road in Malaysia full with potholes. I don't know if it's because of the car's sucky suspension or because he don't know how to drive fast correctly. It doesn't really matter if we go using Herr J's car or other people because Herr J will pay for everything including meals. However it never occur to other people to do the same everytime they ask for favors from Herr J. They must've think that Herr J's car runs on saliva and that tolls and parkings and every kind of entrance ticket is given to Herr J for free from god. Then went to Pyramid. Also it doesn't matter if Herr J win or lose because he won't get money from the loser, however he pays when he loses. Nobody gave us any baby stuff. They must think it's free for us too. They kept asking money, giving stupid face to eat something stupid and overpriced while I, the pregnant wife starve. Herr J on the other hand spend money like he will die tomorrow and as if his parents will live forever. Before I met him, if the world falls into chaos and all the people I know are dead, I'd still survive. Herr J is the type of people who spend all his money on the first day of chaos and will die before he will see the end of it, and dragging other people down with him. The rent hasn't been paid yet and he will only pay the utility bills on the day it was cut off. Why am I the only one with common sense, and I'm unable to do anything about it because I hate to tell people what to do and nag at their lack of responsibility.

Was supposed to go to a wedding yesterday but couldn't since Herr J went to turf club. I'm going to end up like Marge with no friends because ALL her time, energy and money is devoted to irresponsible Homer. I'm not like his parasitic so called friends who tag along everywhere he goes because they won't have to pay for anything. How am I going to convince people we're already married for a year when I don't have a wedding ring, I don't even have an engagement ring. The nurses kept calling him my bf I guess because there's no ring on my finger. My account balance is 300, either my dad got alzheimer and forgot how much he banked in for me every month or Herr J stole my money again. It's always the latter. Had to change the password if not my baby will starve. Herr J never cared if I starve. He stole my dowry money. The money that is mine, I wonder if he goes to hell for this since the ustaz clearly state that the money is mine, not my dad's money that he kept stealing, the money is mine. My mother told me to buy a ring with it but I guess I can't afford it now. I really regretted didn't hide it away like I did all my savings. In the end it doesn't matter because he will beg for money from me to pay rent or bills anyway. February's rent hasn't been paid yet and since Herr J stole my money I guess he lost all his salary money playing snooker or gambling at the turf club. He now owes me 2810, not including all the rent and bills and food I paid since we met. I have to pay 3 times more to feed him than he paid for me because I'm not a pig I don't eat until I get full. Paid for food last night so now my bb & kindle savings is back to 0. I have to save every cent now because Herr J couldn't afford it even though he promised me a bb. It's not from the kindness of his heart, he used my money to pay off his betting debts, otherwise I'd already have it by last year. He would never change my phone line to his because that would mean he actually has to pay for all the calls he makes using my phone. I think if my dad falls dead right now Herr J couldn't call anyone to join him waste his money since he never even afford rm10 topup a week. I think he spend all his kindness, appreciativeness, sensitivity, thoughtfulness, romanticness, common sense and money to his ex, and now I get nothing as if I'm the one who ruined his life. If I hadn't met Herr J I'd be working, I'd have graduated, I'd gone for island vacations with my friends, I'd gone to Placebo and I can eat and buy all the things I want without asking for any extra money from my parents. I never owe anyone a cent in my life. People owe me money and favors. If they die I hope they go to hell because they took advantage of me. I don't have a life so that other people can have fun.

The kitchen is infested with flies again. I wonder how many years it will take for him to notice that and throw out the garbage. Sometimes I'm the only one in the world who felt the disappointment of boiling water for drinks only for it to disappear. My job is to do everything including laundry, dishes, even cleaning toilets and everything and boil water 24/7 and remind Herr J to throw out the trash. He only goes in the kitchen to open the fridge and drink water. Other people's job is to drink all the water without the courtesy of refilling it and leave dirty dishes all over the kitchen to help the spread of garbage maggots.

And what is this hoo haa about celebrating Valentine? If people have money to celebrate it then fine, why should they listen to narrow minded old fogeys who's holier than thou attitude think god mandated them to dictate other people's lives. If they don't have money then just stay at home and cry like me. I do it everyday in the shower anyways. Why can't they see it from another angle, like it's just an extra special day for lovers instead of focusing on the origins (which they got it wrong). If they really want to live in the past then please outlaw all the other 32894736529 thousands celebrations or ceremonies that meleis took from other cultures because it might break their thin faith in god. At the end of the day, the states with the worst youth are those from the supposedly religious states. Raping, molesting, sodomizing. When will these people understand that it's not what influence people to sin, but it's up to the person's strength to stop them from sinning. We Sarawakian are very laid back, we do everything, we mix with everyone regardless of race and religion. We may come from out in the backwoods but all of us assimilate better than peninsular backwood people, unlike them we don't get culture shock. Our faith won't get swayed just because we go to other people's place of prayers or read their holy books. If the religious people keep confining people to not do something, they will definitely do it. They should just trust people to celebrate and judge Valentine to make them see that it's pointless for themselves. That's how people grow, that's how people think. If this Don't do this don't do that shit keeps going, people will never learn to reason. By people I mean mindless sheeps.

I'm so stressed. I'm hungry but I can't eat since I have no money since I paid for his food yesterday. I've never been so miserable in my life. If there's a god he would make everyone who makes a pregnant woman shed a tear die in a horrible death in front of her eyes. People wonder why I don't smile when they should really think of how I manage to stay alive with people using me this way.

Labels: Marbles Bubbles

☭ monophonic taxi ; He wears a red bandana, plays a blues pianna in a honky-tonk, down in Mexico. He wears a purple sash, and a black moustache, in a honky-tonk, down in Mexico

On Sunday helped (watched) Kak Shima with her catering work. Managed to eat her desert (a very sinful chocolate cake with rich chocolate icing, cut bite sized) and a chicken pie and a cream puff. Her clam chowder smelled so nice but I didn't get to taste it. Her husband got lost geographically and in communicado. I was sent to the party and waited hours in the rain because I was too embarrassed. People kept asking me when's the food going to come. Well how am I supposed to know. If I get lost I ask people. Their guests were all there and there was no food at all so the parents ordered Domino's. SO embarrassed, as if I was the tardy one. The food came an hour and a half late.

Then there was this fucking puppy jogging along the street with fucking bells on it's collar. One time it followed me and brushed against my leg and Abang Zubir just lol'ed from afar when I screamed like a banshee. Didn't get to eat the spaghetti or chicken or clam chowder with mashed potatoes because the neighbors took all the leftovers. I wasn't fazed, all I wanted was pastry. All I wanted was pastry. I said it again. ALL I WANTED WAS PASTRY.

Now I feel like eating caek. And tuna buns. PASTRIES PASTRIES PASTRIES. I think I got this sudden craving for pastries because of thinking too much over the excess sugar in my pee. I started to remember food I eat everyday before I fell into the money pit. Cookies. Chocolate. I used to eat ice cream everyday. EVERYDAY. ALL KINDS OF DESSERTS.

I fried some fritters. Herr J said it tasted like some snack his grandmother made. The one only she knew how to make, his aunties couldn't get the same taste or texture. Mine were noticeably n00b-ish of course, a few of it was hard as stone but as I learnt and the rest of it was okay for a first timer. I love it =)

The rent will go up in the middle of this year. I hope by then we'd found a good house. I want to post pictures but am too lazy to transfer it. Also I think my camera's memory card gone kaput. It's hard to transfer the pictures idk y. Blair is also sick. Now I can hardly read for an hour before the battery dies on me. So it's either a new psp or a Kindle. I'd rather have Kindle so that people won't be busybodies and play with it.

This is adorable! I searched for this version again because anon posted on fb the English version. Why doesn't Jewtube lets us customize the border? There is no border? Am I hallucinating due to lack of sucrose?

Labels: Marbles Bubbles